omg, i just went outside in a long sleeve shirt and jeans. and flip flops.
1.no more snow! weird! really weird!
2. IT'S SO NICE OUTSIDE. it's all sunny and i didn't want to curl up into a fetal position upon leaving my apartment!! so wonderful.
3. i haven't dressed like this in a month. it's always either business casual or imitation boy.
4. the air smells so. good.
5. FLIP FLOPS!
look! a mildly controversial topic!
gentlemen, gather round. protective cups are in the back.
so here's what i've gathered about boys, on a purely observational and possibly flawed scale.
they all think one girl is better than the rest. most often it's a girlfriend. no, it is not true, they say. ha! it usually goes something along the lines of "sure, other girls may be like that. but not [insert girl's name]." or they hold her to a higher standard. i'm not talking about prettier, more intelligent, or what not. i'm talking a better person. i'm talking worth. and now let me tell you something.
that is the biggest piece of bullshit i have ever heard in my entire life.
girls are all. the same. which is to say, if you like her, sure. the sun is gonna shine outta her ass. but someone else loves his girl, and so what makes yours so much better? your opinion? because that's all i can think of. and if that's the case, what makes your opinion better than the next guy's?
and let me address that thing above. that whole sure other girls blah blah blah? no. i don't care who the fuck you are. if you're a girl--no matter how different any of us are--you understand other girls better than any boy, ever. maybe just a little bit more. maybe a lot more. it comes from being a girl-- which guys will never be, except in extreme cases that involve operating tables and possibly silicon. but i digress. if you're a boy, you will never know what it's like when a girl's heart is broken, or when she's pms'ing, or those times she's grumpy just because (you know what i'm talking about). not because you've never had a broken heart, but because you don't know what it's like to be a girl. it's the same reason all my attempts to understand and talk and write about boys in this entry will fall short. no one will ever know, and the only thing left is sympathy.
so when a girl makes a generalization about other girls, you don't assume yours is above that. because we know what it's like, from the crippling insecurity to the concealed but ever present vanity.
we need a companion, not a fucking pedestal. (...if shune makes a short joke here, i'll eat his soul!!!)
what i'm trying to say (and what you probably won't believe) is that your girl is not better. sorry. the value of one is the same as any other. the fact that you love her just makes her that much more beautiful in your eyes. and that's nothing to look down on.
in other news, i got schooled in excel today. my supervisor is so badass.
thoughts as i eat more fries doused with more mayonnaise followed by a milky way bar: 'i'm going to die. really really early. yum.'
trust is a two way thing.
that giant cliff-like dropoff into the forest in the back of my apt building? a group of guys was looking curiously down there. not sure if they were college kids or professional whoserwhatsits. i was just hoping they weren't looking for a body or something. all i know is that on my way up the stairs i pass another guy off to the side, looking at them from about 100 feet away with fierce concentration and opening/shutting his pocket knife. yeah i dont...really wanna think about the implications.
i smiled a lot today. (thanks)
does anybody use mint.com? is it any good? quicken lags.
i was eating corn pops today and two of them had merged together. i was like O_O
sometimes you can see it. you can see other people about to head into a proverbial TRAIN WRECK, and you are all like STOP STOP STOP and they are like i see your point. but what can i do that involves not stopping? and you know, doesnt leave piles of emotional baggage and scarring that will later just cause drama? and you are like YOU IDIOT but only in your head because they're your friends and you don't really wanna say anything.
well, sometimes i can see it with me. shit. SHIT.
sometimes, as much as this restlessness and longing and loneliness just simmers underneath the surface, i'm so, so sure (word of the day: aver) that things will be okay. i don't know if it's because i'll become complacent, or if i'll decide to do something completely crazy and work abroad, but. but it'll be okay. it'll be okay.
...
..
CHILIIIIIIIIS
BABY BACK RIBS
that's where i'm headed to now. and NOT buffalo wild wings and bowling. because de-hermitizing is a GRADUAL PROCESS.
so as i am dragging roughly 80 lbs of groceries up to my apartment, i look down on the stairs. i see
a fish.
a live fish. well. not anymore. =x it was about four inches long. rather cute. kinda flat.
i would say more, but i. i mean. ??????????
rock on, fish.
ETA:
it just occurred to me that the fish, being dead, may find it difficult to rock on. oh well.
i've gotta say one thing. and that one thing is that french fries in mayonnaise is amazing. anybody who's been around me knows i drench everything in mayo or sour cream. how i held off on fries for 20 years, i'll never know.
dude. polo button up shirts are the same for boys as they are for girls. was that common knowledge? because seriously, i spend like 5 minutes longer in the morning trying to button my shirt with my left hand.
so! so! so!!!! at first when Supervisor was like 'k let's get you guys CPS green belt certified' i was all like. dude. way to cop out. i don't want cat production system certification. where's the 6sigma D: but it turns out you have to be 6sigma before you can be CPS!!! which means we're getting certified!!!!!!!! [/nerd]
do i really have to accept delta phi lambda's friend request? i'm almost tempted to ignore it based on the fact that they give their sisters retarded names. no one should have to be subjected to middle names of 'lecoeur', 'gravitee', and 'lumiere'.
i found out earlier this week that 'aperture' means 'hole'. suddenly Portal makes so much more sense.
i got valentine's candy today! from a guy who nicked it from the receptionist's desk. now, you know. you know that on february 15th, a tiny asian girl is going to walmart and buying 3 pounds of chocolate. don't even think about reaching for the chocolate caramels, buddy.
slowly, slowly....
so as not to attract attention or incur any notice...
...slooowwwwllyyyy...
...stealing every pen in the supply closet....
i'll be crash coursing in investing for the next month or so.
don't expect me to get involved or do any of the following:
oi vey.
