i could be cleaning my kitchen. for some reason it smells gross and i swear i am gonna fix it one way or another.
or, i could be doing my shit that i have due tomorrow. or.... not
so, i was wondering.
are you allowed to be happy when you know you shouldn't be? when that married 20-something woman who works at the cafe smiles at you, or your best friend's boyfriend, is it okay to let that not-quite-hope bloom in your chest?
where is the line? what's allowed?
because of course you know you shouldn't. but happiness is happiness, and for such a short time as 80-something years, do we just say fuck it? we take what small pleasure we can find, wherever it is?
i'm of two minds on the matter. sometimes it just leads to no good, and everyone knows it.
but i've always been prone to needlessly complicating things. maybe i should just give it a rest.
if there is one thing i have learned, it's that everything comes at a price.
take what you want and pay for it.